This post was inspired by a text exchange with a dear friend who lives in a place with cold and snow. It went something like this.
“I probably could have got out yesterday, but why, where am i going ? The driveway has 13 inches of snow on it!”
I texted back: “You are so smart. I get so tired of these losers who think they need to clear off their driveway and go somewhere. I’m like, save the earth, and stay warm, stay the ***k in your own house lol”
Friends, I urge you: Save the planet, be lazy! If you want some aerobic exercise, then go ahead and shovel your driveway — but still, don’t go out.
I am of course assuming that you have already done the responsible thing and stockpiled plenty of snacks, self-medication supplies, etc. If you haven’t, my deepest sympathies, But you are more likely to remember for next time. And, in the meantime, now could be a good time to explore that “health fast” that you have (not) been intending to do. Distract yourself with Netflix or a craft project.
Or, get really wild and bake something! Did you know –- all those big bags of flour and sugar and salt that’s taking up space in your cabinet can be made into edible items. Yes, I was shocked to find this out also, but once you get used to it it’s pretty cool. Extra bonus points if you have any milk, cheese, or eggs taking up space in your fridge.
I realize this is a bit off the beaten track, but more people are waking up to the wild and wonderful world of actually using up what’s in the deepest recesses of their pantries.
Never is there a better time to slack off than the dead of winter!!! Unless of course it’s the dead of summer.
In all seasons, you have my blessing to slack off for Mother Earth, my dear friends!
Note: this is at least partially tongue-in-cheek, I do understand that some people have to go to the doctor, go to work, and so on. But those of us who are able to push back, and resist the relentless capitalist pressure, should do so for the benefit of all. Push back against those rigid bosses. Eliminate the need for a job by minimizing your overhead. Random oddball side-gigs can cover a lot.
Also on a serious note, I never knew this but supposedly the medical industry is warning anyone over 45 to not shovel snow! Because so many people drop dead from heart attacks from shoveling snow, supposedly. I have always heard occasional reports of people dropping dead shoveling snow, but the numbers seem to be escalating a lot. I wonder how much of this is because a lot of us modern people haven’t learned the proper technique. ???
I also have to wonder if the caution against shoveling one’s own snow is motivated by the snowplow operators industrial complex etc. (“Hey little lady, (or Hey big guy!) leave this to the professionals!”)
Anyway, if you don’t feel able to shovel your driveway, I strongly recommend hiring someone just to be on the safe side. Don’t put yourself at unnecessary medical risk. You’ll be protecting yourself and also supporting a local small business.
Note that I am NOT mentioning the snowblower as an option. Here is this whole season that gives us a break from leaf-blowers, what’s the point if we’re just going to buy a snowblower? Of course if the person you hired happens to use a snow-blower it can’t be helped, and at least you don’t have to keep your own snowblower and take up that space in your garage.) Refrain from buying your own snowblower. Yes I know the relentless big-box hardware store industrial complex will be up in arms at my sacrilegious opinion.
On the general topic of the power of slacking off, check out my book, _constructive laziness: how to save the planet by doing nothing whatsoever_.
(Note, the above is just boldfaced text, not an actual link. Your computer is not broken. This fabulous book is not yet actually in physical existence LOL, but it has been living in my head for years, and I’ve been sharing excerpts of it. And I swear will be launching it as a book as soon as I overcome my laziness and actually write it down! That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
Added later: A fellow permie commented wonderfully, “All the ways of past movement are totally doable on top of snow shoeing, sledding etc etc. I’m no expert but my bro says their snow days are like our hurricane days. No one wants/can drive anywhere so everyone’s out meeting the neighbors and walking around and just enjoying being humans. No need to ‘only’ be stuck in house 🙂“
#decolonize #dismantlesupremacyculture #LeaveTheLeaves #SlackOffOnSnow #KissOffCapitalism