This is in response to a friend and fellow activist who posted about why she and her husband got divorced. She wanted kids, and at the time they dated and got married, he told her that he too wanted kids.
But then he changed his mind (or he never wanted kids in the first place but was just saying that).
And over time she realized that over the years of the marriage, she had become basically nothing but a live-in servant and emotional support. She thought, what’s the point, if I don’t get to be a Mom (which I want to), and have no hope of being a grandmother.
I wrote the following:
It’s always bothered me, even back when I was interested in dating and marrying, that our society places so much emphasis on the couple relationship.
It’s a lot of burden to place on one relationship, and I think it makes us and our society brittle.
Note, I am very supportive and happy for my friends who are coupled by choice in a mutually happy and supportive and beneficial relationship. 
But also, a lot of us seniors are simply forming or seeking to form small pods and groups where we share housing and expenses and some degree of friendship or social support.
Over the years I have found a lot more love, strength, and durability in cultivating a net of friendship/community. For me, by choice, all of those have been platonic, but there’s no reason why dating or being a couple can’t also be part of a larger, strong community web.
Also, I have been part of strong and healthy community webs where some of the couples, individuals, etc., were non-monogamous.
All too often I see couples be this isolated nucleus, almost like the two-person version of a hermit.
Resilience and anti-fragility via web of relationships is what I’m going for.
Here’s this same post on my DEEP GREEN Facebook page in case you want to share and/or see a more visual version.
Some resources for people who want to get beyond the “nuclear couple monoculture” thing: “decolonizing love” page on Facebook; Desireé B Stephens on Facebook and Substack.
Also, simply observe examples from history to the present day, of indigenous community structures. This includes your own roots if you know them. You can also see healthy community-weighted relationship structures around the world via TikTok. And, if you are lucky enough to be in proximity to a healthy culture, observe how they don’t put the couple relationship above everything else.
And specifically for senior women seeking community-oriented living situations: check out “senior women cohousing” group on Facebook.